The Stress of Uncertainty

I don't deal well with uncertainty.  I don't like when I don't know what's going to happen, whether it be plans for a weekend or the next five years of my life.  I have been trying very hard to calm myself down and not allow myself to get caught up in the stress of not knowing, but it is very difficult.  Our lives are in such an unstable place right now that it is wracking havoc on my ability to be in control.  Throughout the entire application process for PHD programs I have chanted "God has a plan, God has a plan" to remind myself that sometimes I am not always the one in control.  However, when the decisions started pouring in, and they weren't the decisions that I had planned on, it wasn't easy.

After several days of hardly getting a word out without crying, I am finally at a point where I can go about my daily business without Munchkie coming up and putting a hand on me saying "Mommy ok?  No crying Mama."  She is so sweet!  While our future is still completely up in the air and we have quite a few difficult decisions to make in the upcoming months, I have to remind myself that "God has a plan" and so I need to move on and pray that we can make the best decisions based on what his plan is.  We didn't plan on Munchkie, but what an AMAZING blessing she has been in our lives.  I can only hope and pray that we continue to be bestowed with more blessings as amazing as she (without there being more kids involved, haha).
I found the lyrics to this hymn tonight and it really spoke to me.

I Know Who Holds The Future
~Ira Forest Stamphill

I don't know about tomorrow,
I just live from day to day.
I don't borrow from it's sunshine,
For it's skies may turn to gray.
I don't worry o'er the future,
For I know what Jesus said,
And today I'll walk beside Him,
For He knows what is ahead.
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.
Ev'ry step is getting brighter,
As the golden stairs I climb;
Ev'ry burden's getting lighter;
Ev'ry cloud is silver lined.
There the sun is always shining,
There no tear will dim the eyes,
At the ending of the rainbow,
Where the mountains touch the sky.
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.
I don't know about tomorrow,
It may bring me poverty;
But the One Who feeds the sparrow,
Is the One Who stands by me.
And the path that be my portion,
May be through the flame or flood,
But His presence goes before me,
And I'm covered with His blood.
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.