No Princesses Here

I have a little pet peeve.  No.  Not a little one.  A HUGE pet peeve.  I can not handle the little divas of today.  I can not handle when I go into a store and see little girls throwing temper tantrums in the aisles and their tired mothers' give in to them to avoid a scene.  Because with each "compromise" a girl realizes that she has control over her parents and that she can continue to throw a fit to get what she wants.  I spend a lot of time hoping and praying that I am not that mother in one of those aisles.  I can not handle the mentality that each girl is a princess who should get whatever she wants.  The phrase "treat her like a princess" does not mean to give into her every whim, as most people think. 

A few weeks ago when Munchkie and I walked into her classroom there was someone visiting who made a comment about Munchkie being such a little princess and recent events started to come together.  I had seen this parent in the classroom several times and a few day prior to this Munchkie came home, found a blanket and put it on her head.  She pranced around saying "I a pin-sess Mommy!  I a pin-sess!"  and I told her then "We don't have princess in this house, so take the blanket off your head or pretend something else."  See, pretending to be a princess today is very different than pretending to be a princess when I was growing up.  I used to pretend to have tea parties, I loved the Disney Princess movies and spent hours in my great grandmother's old heels wearing my mother's old dresses.  However, the lessons I learned from the Disney Princesses were not lessons of being entitled and privileged but of overcoming difficult times- which everyone has, including princesses. 

So today, when a nice Italian man said to Munchkie "oh aren't you a little princess" to which she energetically agreed, I refrained from stating the thoughts in my head.  I wanted to shoot off that she was not a princess, we didn't believe in princesses, she has manners and respect for others around her.  But I refrained and instead smiled, said "yeah she's a crazy" and kept walking.  In my head I began to think about how I was going to combat this princess mentality.  Because I will not have a diva with a princess mentality.  I will continue to enforce manners, treating others with respect, and selflessness and hope that I can help form a beautiful girl who exemplifies these qualities..

I'm No Damsel

A few weeks ago I heard something that I can't stop thinking about.  It had to do with females being the weaker sex which I usually get very fired up about.  I like to think that we are completely equal and can do things just as well as men.  The verse in the Bible that says for wives to be submissive to their husbands gets taken out of context so often and this is what starts the fire in me.  Some people think that this means women should have no voice, do whatever the male sex tells them and basically be human doormats.  I tend to disagree with this.

Over the last few years we have had some role reversals in our house and it's caused a little bit of conflict.  It's very hard for me to be the primary breadwinner, wife and mother. At the same time it's hard for Munchkie's Daddy to stay home, taking care of Munchkie, doing dinner and picking up some cleaning/laundry. I'm learning that maybe there is something about this difference between males and females.  I don't think that it means we as females have to be damsels in distress, but we are created differently.  Somewhere recently this is what someone told me, and it makes a lot of sense.  They asked me what I do when I walk alone at night in a parking lot.  I of course answered that I look all around me and try to be aware of my surroundings.  Then they asked Munchkie's Daddy what he does when he walks alone at night in a parking lot.  He answered, nothing, he just walks to his car.  I found this pretty interesting.  No matter how hard we try to be strong and self sufficient we are still vulnerable.  The person who told us this example said that women are the weaker sex, we cannot change this, but it doesn't mean we have to be a doormat.  It just means that we live our lives differently and experience situations differently.

As the vulnerable and weaker sex I realize that I really do want someone to take care of me and protect me.  I guess if I was to add to the example, I would want to have my husband walk with me in the parking lot.  If he walked with me, I would still look around me, but not feel my heart racing because there is someone there to protect me and fight with me.  This is what it means to me to be the weaker sex.  I now understand that I am not necessarily a damsel in distress by being a vulnerable female, but I am a female who doesn't like to feel the pressure of holding the family together on my shoulders.  
Yes, I can be the breadwinner, wife and mother, but I will still check behind me in a parking lot.  It doesn't make me a weak person, it just makes me a female.